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Tears are the body's way of telling you that you need to get laid
2003-08-09 | 11:26 p.m. *"...This may be the last thing that i write for long. Can you hear me smiling when i sing this song, for you and only you... Somehow I knew that it would be this way, Somehow I knew that it would slowly fade. Now i'm gone, just try and stop me now. You wanted the best, it wasn't me, will you give it back? Now i'll take the lead, when there's no more room to make it grow. I'll see you again, you'll pretend you're naive, is this what you want? Is this what you need, how you end up let me know. As I go, remember all the simple things you know, My mind is just a crutch and I still hope, that you will miss me when I'm gone This is the last song. And will you need me now, you'll find a way somehow. You want it too, I want it too. As I go, remember all the simple things you know, My mind is just a crutch and I still hope, that you will miss me when I'm gone This is the last song...."* *sigh* things have been nice today.. i didnt get into any fights perse... i was an assertive bitch for a while lol BUT i have the rights to do that right?? mike is gonna teach me how to snowboard this winter... ROCK ON!!! PARTY NAKED!! i cant wait!! b/c if i get good, then i can get a snowboard AND a skateboard and be a lil bitch... no, i dont want to be like avril lavange... o wait! ill be able to play my guitar... not jus stand there, hold it and pretend to strum while im singing... way to go! BUT im so clumsy lol.. mike says its ok if im on my bum most of the time but i dunno... im gonna be embarrassed... lol o well w/e! im talking to my dahling Shebah.. we're deff going shopping before school.... YAY!! in the adrian mall has this photo machine that makes STICKERS!! i love stickers!! they rock! but i dont think they have one of those in the portland mall?? if they do tho then im gonna get some made lol... but hopefully my eyebrows grow back in lol... ok, in 6th grade (painful memory time) i didnt like my eyebrows SO i shaved em... like 1/2 off... and im not joking (ask phil... :( lol) and so i was like IM NOT TOUCHING THEM AGAIN!! but i went back and did this summer... well ive plucked em.. and ive tweased a LITTLE too much off the back.. they dont look any worse than some super models w/ em thin... except mine arent thin.. they're like uhhh a curve but a SHORT one... sooo im running around looking somewhat surprised.. no its nothing you said.. im jus permanantly like this.. a few more days lol... im going to shave them and stencil them w/ AUBURN eyeliner pencils.. itll look soooo natural!! me and naomi arent umm w/e we were... i told zach that i thot naomi was mad at me b/c she didnt talk to me.. and well i guess he told her.. but see if i tell him anything any more.. i want to know nvm.. im not going to say what i want to know incase they read it.. grrrr.... but neways i guess ninno's having a hard time at home.. so i told her im here if she wants to talk (of course, ann landers, right here) so neways im supposed to be here tomorrow night... hopefully tomorrow isnt too out of the ordinary.. and im properly equipt to do my job.. as long as dad ignored me, dottie says NOTHING about my appearance the other night and nothing drastic happens in the afternoon.. i have this bad feeling w/ charlie right now.. but i dont know.. w/e happens happens i guess.. and im sure he'll be drunk and w/ another girl if something does... *GAWD* some days i wish i could have a carefree day and be happy all the time instead of jus acting it.. after a while fake smiles make your jaw hurt.. i must look real cool.. in most pics i have fake smiles... the ones from camp however, are real... how did that happen?? how did i open myself up for a week like that.. take chances like that and not give a shit??? im blown away.. and it was all unconsiously done too.. *hummm*.. and look where it got me? no place. well i got shebah actually so i guess it did get me something.. but still.. im jus your average girl... your best friend's little sister that you think is cute but annoying... or that girl you sit by in french and ask for help but think im too brainy... or the girl that has the top locker that has pictures plastering her door but you think im not your type, too punk, too bitch, too wild, too dorky... too much of a challenge... sure we can be friends but more? no, my boobs are real, you can see my true skin color.. i say what i think... im not good enuff for you... *sigh* sooo ill go back to school, watch the couples making out by the lockers and remember that i was once one of them.. and i still could be im sure if i felt like pressing myself thru the wringer again.. but this year.. no.. this year is MY year.. if im single, well i am.. if im not, well things arent gonna be the same as now.. dont like me? tough... appearences can be quite deceving.. trust me.. b/c i know.. and yah, who knows? maybe ill break down the barriers again.. for more than a week.. we'll see i guess.. *rock on w/ sophmore year* but neways, ive got a rocking headache.. and no anaprox.. so im gonna go take some nyquil shit and go to bed.. until tomorrow :.+*muah*+.: |